Plot: Your relationship with Kyuhyun was damn near perfect but out of nowhere it began to decline to the point neither of you talked. One night you catch Kyuhyun alone in the bedroom with his laptop, which is when you finally snap.
You stared at Kyuhyun. He was sitting across you, eating in silence. He didn’t even look up at you, focused entirely on his food. You were fully aware of his love for food—he had reminded you many times in the course of your relationship—but he never completely ignored you. But he’d been doing that lately. Every time you saw each other, it felt like you weren’t even there. He would hardly say two words to you.
Even though you were both busy, it wasn’t like you didn’t see each other. You did live together. Yet it was like you were never really together. He greeted you each morning, made himself breakfast, and left. Then he’d come home, say hello, then drop himself down at his desk to play video games until dinner. And at dinner it was the same silence.
When you’d first started dating, it was nonstop talking. You couldn’t get enough of his mind, his wit, his passion, everything about Kyuhyun. You were always discussing something with him, video games or jokes or books, anything.
But that had changed, and it was like you were talking to a wall. Kyuhyun hardly ever responded, and when he did, you usually ended up in a fight. You soon gave up on any endeavor to rebuild the communication you’d once had. Now, there was just silence between you.
You stood and brought your plate to the sink where you rinsed it with fury. You slammed it into the dish rack, seeing if it would elicit some sort of response from him. But nothing.
Gathering your coat and scarf, you slipped on your shoes. “I’m going out,” you explained curtly. You needed to clear your head.
He looked up at you and nodded.
You held in a scream of frustration and walked out, closing the door behind you with a bang.
It was snowing outside, and the air was a biting frost. You were used to the cold though, at least emotionally. Physical cold was nothing compared to the emptiness in your chest. Kyuhyun used to make you feel warm and safe, even when you weren’t together, but now all you felt was hollow. You didn’t know how much more of this you could handle.
You wandered the street, ignoring the snow falling in your hair. You weren’t sure where it all went downhill, but it had been months of the same detached routine between the two of you. Your relationship wasn’t the same, and it just made you wonder if Kyuhyun even wanted you anymore.
Even your sex life had disappeared. Kyuhyun used to be insatiable, especially when he had found out how talented you were with your mouth. You used to tease him, but he always reciprocated. His thick tongue combined with the dexterity he’d trained in his fingers had been more than enough for you. Not to mention the sex itself. You used to have sex every night, if not several times a night. But it had been months since the last time he had done anything physical with you, not even kissing. You didn’t know how to explain it. It wasn’t like Kyuhyun could just suddenly stop wanting to have sex, even if it was just for selfish reasons.
Your feet had carried you back to your apartment, and you stared at the door. There had been a time when Kyuhyun had been your world. You dug through your pockets for your keys. You’d hoped that you would marry him, see the world together, have kids, have a life with him. Now any future with him seemed bleak at best. Was there even a future? You unlocked the door.
The lights were off inside. Kyuhyun must have gone to sleep already. How long had you been out? You slipped off your shoes and hung up your coat before walking into the living room. You’d expected to find him playing video games, but he really did go to bed. It was silent and pitch black in the apartment.
You yawned and stretched upward, walking toward the bedroom. You opened the door a crack and peeked in to make sure you weren’t waking Kyuhyun up. But you froze, caught off guard by the sight before you.
Kyuhyun sat in bed with his laptop. His head was tilted back, eyes closed. You weren’t sure what he was doing—his laptop obscuring most of your view of him—until you heard him let out a deep groan. He was masturbating. You heard some more moaning, but it sounded like it was from his computer. He was watching porn and masturbating.
He really didn’t need you anymore.
You weren’t mad. You should have been. You were just sad because it really was over. You opened the door all the way, and the noise caught Kyuhyun’s attention. He stopped and looked up at you, eyes wide in surprise.
“You-you’re back,” he stammered, closing his laptop. He fumbled for his clothes.
But you said nothing. You ignored him, like he always ignored you. You didn’t even look at him. Instead, you retrieved a bag from your closet and began to thoughtlessly throw clothes in it. You needed to get out of there for the night.
“What are you doing?” he asked.
“Leaving,” you said, your throat prickling and swelling.
“Why?” He was behind you now, fully dressed. His voice was soft, and you could feel his breath on your hair as he hovered close.
You turned around suddenly. “Because it’s over,” you said, feeling the emotions welling in the pit in your chest. “Kyuhyun, it’s over. I can’t do this little charade anymore.”
“This,” you said, waving your hand between the two of you. “We’re not us anymore. We’re like roommates who just so happen to sleep in the same bed. We have our own lives. We never talk. You don’t need me in your life.” Your voice cracked. “Not even for your sexual needs, it seems.”
Kyuhyun spoke again. “But that’s not true.”
You stopped him. “Save it,” you said, suddenly growing angry. “I don’t want to hear it. I’ve put up with more than enough for the past few months in an effort to keep this relationship going, but I’m done.” You zipped your bag with a note of finality. You looked up at him, eyes smarting with the tears you hadn’t shed, and glared. “You clearly don’t need me. You have your right hand, and it seems to do a better job than me since you prefer it over me.”
“Shut up,” Kyuhyun snapped, grabbing your bag out of your hand. He threw it aside. “You act like this is all my fault, but it’s not! I don’t know why we’re like this. I’ve been wondering it for months, but I can’t even figure it out. Every time I try to talk to you, you just argue with me.”
“Kyuhyun, I don’t want to talk about this anymore. You don’t want me anymore. I’ve accepted it, and I’m done,” you said, pushing past him to pick up your bag.
“No,” Kyuhyun said, catching your arm. “I’m not giving up on us.” He spun you around, and his arms held you tight against his body, and you couldn’t escape his embrace. “You’re wrong. I do want you,” he said, voice rough. He captured your lips in his, and you wavered, feeling his desire was real.
It had been so long since you’d last felt Kyuhyun’s mouth on yours that this was like a brand new experience. His lips moved against yours, swiftly parting yours. His tongue was unyielding and ruthless, tasting you like he’d never had you before. His hands held you firmly, but you didn’t want to go anywhere.
Your hands slithered up his body, sliding underneath his shirt. He growled into your mouth and pulled away. He moved to your neck, sucking and biting the flushed skin. You gasped at the sensation.
Kyuhyun moved at lightning speed. He wrenched your shirt over your head and kissed you again, propelling you toward the bed. His fingers traveled up your back and traced circles until they reached your bra clasp. He deftly unhooked and cast it aside. He couldn’t seem to get enough of you, his hands all over your body. You gasped into his mouth as his thumb found your nipple.
You felt the edge of the bed at the back of your knee and sank into it, catching yourself on your forearms. You crawled backward with Kyuhyun clambering atop you, never surrendering your lips.
The top of your head cracked against the headboard, but you felt nothing, only focused on Kyuhyun, who had somehow managed to unbutton your jeans with one hand. You slithered out of them and took his face in your hands, nibbling on his lower lip. You yanked at his shirt. He unzipped his own pants and kicked them off.
His fingers tangled in your slightly damp hair. Kyuhyun’s erection brushed against you and your breath hitched. It had been so long since you’d last had his cock. He broke away from your lips and removed his underwear. He didn’t think twice and pushed into you. He pulled out and slammed back into you.
You gasped, clawing at his back. Your limbs jumbled together as he began to pick up speed with each thrust. Your bodies rocked together, and you found yourself responding eagerly against him. His hips would probably leave bruises with the intensity of his thrusts, each adding to the white-hot fire growing in your core. You writhed as it spread through your veins. It burned a path to your extremities until your body couldn’t contain it anymore, and you climaxed, stronger than you ever had.
You closed your eyes and moaned, lost in a heady euphoria. Your walls spasmed and contracted around Kyuhyun, sending him over the edge. He let out the most delicious deep groan, and it only served to intensify your orgasm.
Just as quickly as it came, Kyuhyun collapsed on top of you, his skin slick with a mix of your sweat and his. Your toes cramped, and your limbs were jelly, limp at your side. You felt feverish and tingly, your chest heavy with each breath.
Mustering some more energy, Kyuhyun picked himself up and leaned down to your ear. His voice was husky and raspy as he whispered. “Don’t ever say that I don’t want you because I will always want you.” He licked his lips, breath hot on the shell of your ear. “I won’t let you forget it.”
Your breathing had slowed to normal by then. You looked up at him, straight into his golden brown eyes, trying to ignore the sexual tension in the air. “But how? We can’t go on like this,” you said softly, brushing his hair back from his forehead.
“I’ll stop being selfish because that’s what it is,” he admitted, pecking at your lips.
You sighed. “And I’ll try harder to be understanding of your interests.”
Kyuhyun kissed your forehead. “I love you,” he whispered.
You smiled. “You haven’t said that in a while,” you said.
“I know,” he said, “and I’m sorry.” His lips trailed down to your neck. He paused. “Aren’t you going to say it back?” he asked, a smirk teasing at his lips.
You grinned. “I love you, too, Cho Kyuhyun,” you said.
He chuckled. “That’s what I thought.” Then his lips came crashing down on yours again. He was clearly not done for the night.
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